Good etiquette seems to be gone with the wind and can rarely be found in any situation. Whether manners at a dinner, or opening the door for ladies in our midst, and for sure respecting the elderly if for no other reason than their age. Social graces are rare. However, even dating social graces can still be found by those who will not settle for less.
A date whether a special night out, or to a movie should be an enjoyable experience. Treating each other with respect should not have to be an effort on anyone’s part, but a natural byproduct of being a nice person.
I would love to give you the “be” attitudes of dating, but fell short in doing ten. I did come up with a few like:
- Blessed is the father who refuses to allow his daughter to go running to a car that has parked on the street or in the driveway, and the driver has just honked the horn!
- Or like this one: Blessed is the father who requires he meet a young man before he allows his daughter to go anywhere with him.
- Blessed is the young man who is willing to come to the door and greet the girl’s parents, dressed appropriately, willing to extend his hand – ready with a strong hand shake, and a “my name is Joe Blow, nice to meet you.”
- Blessed is the young man who opens the door for his date.
- Blessed is the young man who is ready to pay for the meal and the movie and remembers that his date has a curfew.
- One thing for sure is that College students tend to run in packs as do High School age kids. Wherever they can crash after a group event is where they land. They tend to get acquainted with several before realizing that one in the group may be special.
- Also each one is obligated to pay for his or her own food even when the relationship has progressed. Going “Dutch” came in with the sixties and women’s liberation.
- Whether it is more difficult to meet people or if it is the going trend, the Internet did not come in to play where dating was concerned 15-20 years ago. However now, college age students say they rely on the Internet sites for meeting people. It appears that the ones they meet at college are friends who may or may not be a potential life mate.
- Once women and or men dated awhile fell in love and did not pay too much attention to the financial stability of the other. Now with the increase in an education young people are waiting longer to get married, it seems the trend is moving toward finding someone who is financially stable before getting serious.
- Not kissing on a first date or going to bed with someone you’ve just met is still in order for many reasons. It may be the trend, but having close contact so soon can ruin the chance for a better relationship later. There is something to be said about people who save themselves for that special person. One thing is the trust that evolves, and that you are not used merchandise, or you have more respect for yourself, therefore gaining the respect of your date.
Considering the fact that dating from my vantage point spans several years, it seems that each decade brings with it an “acceptable” for that era. There are still southern gentlemen out there who have not given up their heritage of treating a girl with respect and courtesy. There are still southern girls, who are looking for the southern gentlemen type. So don’t give up. Keep up with the proper etiquette instead of today’s trend and you are sure to find your match who is willing to receive your social graces or to extend them, whatever the case may be.
Guest post by: Doris T.